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Writer's pictureWinson Yang

Marriage is more than love


What is marriage? Some people say it is a union between a man and a woman. Some say that it is building on the love you have for your partner. It could also mean an official statement to show that you love somebody. That could be the reason why people get married. Some people also get married because of economic reasons. For example, if you are a foreigner of Country A, and you want to work in Country A, one way for you to do that, is to be married to a citizen of Country A. There are people who do that. Other economic reasons could include sharing the price of housing where the cost of owning a house is expensive, and the convenient way to own a house is to get married. However, these are not the complete idea of marriage.

When two people decide to get married, there are many issues to consider. One that tops the list is of course the love for each other. "Till death do us apart" sounds simple when you think about romantic novels, but it requires a lot of understanding, patience, and respect for your partner, because you now live in wedlock, live by your weddings vows, and most importantly, live with your partner. Hence, both parties must maintain respect, compromise, and mutual understanding for each other. It is more than just love.

Marriage should also help the couple with personal in interpersonal growth. Since the newly wed couples will or may start living together, there will be house habits that the other partner dislike, like leaving the cup facing up or the bottom. Hence, both parties will have to help each other to grow as a person, and also as a couple or family. Furthermore, if there is a child, the child will also help the parents build confidence in different matters, personal strength, courage, and compassion. Hence this is why marriage is more than just love. It is personal and interpersonal growth.

Ultimately, in a marriage, couples must share the same values, from raising children, to communication style, morality, and even philosophy. With conflicting values, it is hard to stay strong in a marriage. Marriage should help us cultivate better as a person. It is not only in our personal boundaries, Marriage help us to develop compassion, patience, vigor, morality and responsibility, and wisdom. Although we could develop those by ourselves too, having a partner will also motivate us to be a better version of ourselves for our partner, our children, our friends, families, people around us, and our community.

At the end, when we think about marriage, we should not just think about love alone. Love alone is not sufficient to sustain a marriage. Respect, mutual understanding, values, are all important for the marriage to grow, develop, and sustain. Without those, it would be like a boat losing its direction because the captain does not have a map, or a compass to direct its course of travel.

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